I Just Wanted A Family

I — Each opponent sacrifices a creature unless they discard two cards.
II — Return up to two creature cards from any graveyard to the battlefield under your control. They are Horrors in addition to their other types.
III — Until end of turn, creatures you control gain deathtouch and “Whenever this creature deals combat damage to a player, exile a card from their hand or graveyard.”

“You’re not going anywhere.”