Sheogorath
+1: Choose creature you control and flip a coin. If win, that creature gets Cheesetouch. If lose, that creature gets Decayed and must attack if able.
0: Add X loyalty counters to Sheogorath, where X is equal to the amount of creatures you control with Cheesetouch.
-13: Search your library for a card called Wabbajack, put it on the battlefield, then shuffle. Players then exile half their library.
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